As I stepped into the Oxley BizHub 2 on August 3, 2024, I could feel a buzz of excitement. The Facilitators Network Singapore (FNS) was hosting another Community of Practice (CoP) session as part of its 20th anniversary celebration, and I was eager to participate. The topic? The often-overlooked area of emotions in facilitation.
From the outset, our facilitators, Angeline Chng and Kiat Lim, posed many thought-provoking questions and discussion topics which made me ponder questions such as:
Had I ever considered leaving my emotions at the door when stepping into my role as a process facilitator?
Could I simply choose a different emotion at will?
As the workshop unfolded, it became clear that the answers weren’t as straightforward as I thought. Our emotions I realised, play a central role in shaping our presence as facilitators and influence our effectiveness. Yet in our profession’s intense focus on processes, we often undervalue this emotional aspect of our work.
This realisation was enlightening. It made me reflect on my own practice and wonder how much attention I’d been paying to my emotional state during facilitation sessions.
Exploring Sense-see-bility
During the session, I was drawn into an eye-opening exercise that helped me identify emotions arising during facilitation. Through short skits and group discussions, I became aware of the various feelings that can surface while leading a session. More importantly, I started to understand how these emotions could affect my effectiveness as a facilitator.
One activity paired us up to act out various emotions. We repeated this exercise, selecting emotions from The Feelings Wheel the second time around. While choosing an emotion seemed simple, accurately portraying it was challenging. The Feelings Wheel, with its clear definitions, made this easier; “Name it to tame it” was one phrase which came up in the discussions.
This exercise highlighted the nuances and distinctions within our emotional spectrum, something I hadn’t fully appreciated before. I realised that during facilitation, I might be experiencing multiple emotions simultaneously. This newfound awareness made me reflect on how these emotional states might impact my work without my conscious recognition.
The activity gave me a new sense of emotional awareness and a desire to explore how to harness emotions to become a more effective facilitator.
The Feelings Wheel
Source: University of Central Arkansas
The workshop introduced me to the subject-object theory which emphasises the importance of emotional awareness in facilitation, suggesting that recognising my emotions is the first step to navigating them effectively.
We explored different emotions associated with various roles in facilitation. For example:
- As a participant: embarrassed, disharmony, invisible, anxious, confused, agitated, awkward, frustrated.
- As a lead facilitator: loss of face, disoriented, deflated, anxious, awkward, frustrated.
- As a co-facilitator: concerned, depressed, disappointed, disrespected.
We discussed whether emotions could be left at the door. One participant noted, “When emotions come in, we may not be able to continue.” Another added, “Neutrality is often explored a lot but not emotion.” This discussion highlighted how life experiences colour our perspective and how things can go wrong despite thorough preparation.
Towards Emotional Agility
Through experiential practices and reflective sharing, we gained valuable techniques for navigating the reactions and actions that accompany emotions.
A focus was placed on emotions as a predisposition to action. Angeline and Kiat encouraged us how to make intentional choices to enter and exit emotional states, leveraging the four key body dispositions: Resolute, Flexibility, Openness, and Stability. These dispositions were presented as tools to shift our own emotion as a facilitator and influence the room’s mood to support desired outcomes.
Kiat introduced the concept of limbic resonance, a neurological phenomenon that explains why a positive, calm facilitator can create a harmonious and productive atmosphere. We learned that by effectively exploring our emotions as facilitators, we can create an environment that enhances trust, creativity, and engagement. This can lead to improved group dynamics and better outcomes. This concept brought home to me the importance of emotional awareness in facilitation practice.
Reflections on the Role of Emotion in Facilitation
Whilst exploring the impact of emotions on facilitation effectiveness, we uncovered several insights:
- Emotional awareness enhances communication and self-regulation.
- Emotions influence body language, performance, and judgement.
- Feedback can have enduring effects on a facilitator’s belief system.
- The facilitation journey is as crucial as the outcome.
- “Stepping out to snap out” was shared by an audience member, emphasising the importance of a facilitator’s energy.
Developing Emotional Agility
This skill involves being flexible with our thoughts and feelings, allowing us to respond better to everyday situations. Developing emotional agility helps us navigate our emotions more effectively, avoiding the traps of suppressing or dwelling on unproductive feelings, and can also help guide group dynamics.
| Emotional Rigidity | Emotional Agility |
|---|---|
| Hooked by thoughts, feelings, and behaviours that don’t serve us. | The ability to enter and exit an emotion intentionally. |
| Bottling, brooding (suppress / wallow), stuckness. | Be flexible thoughts and feelings so we can respond optimally to everyday situations. |
Emotional Agility in Practice
The workshop provided me with some practical tips for developing emotional agility:
- Mindfulness: Being aware of one’s emotions and their impact on decision-making.
- Self-control: Learning to temper and navigate our emotions effectively.
- Letting go: Developing the ability to release emotions that do not serve the facilitation process.
- Alignment: Ensuring congruence between language, emotion and body language.
Which Emotion Affects You the Most?
During the session, we were encouraged to consider which emotions affected us the most and to practice letting go of past emotional baggage. The rich discussion provided some insights:
- Moods as emotions that persist longer and can be felt but are invisible.
- Different body dispositions shape conversations and influence the group dynamic.
- The importance of bringing up energy in the room – “Step out to snap out” was one shared phrase.
- Encouraging openness and expanding one’s repertoire of postures and expressions.
- The challenges of maintaining a positive demeanour when representing an organisation and the importance of starting the day positively.
Conclusion
The workshop highlighted the importance of emotions in facilitation. Whether through cultural or professional norms, we are often encouraged to leave emotions behind in a professional environment, especially when facilitating. While emotions aren’t inherently good or bad, I learned how to embrace them more productively. By developing emotional agility, I now know I can create positive group dynamics and achieve better outcomes.
This CoP provided a safe space for our group, which included people from all walks of life and backgrounds, to explore the emotional side of our work. It offered practical tools and insights to enhance our own facilitation practice. As with all the FNS events, there was a lot of friendly discussion and laughter along the way, with many actionable insights we can use in our facilitation work. As facilitation evolves, I feel that navigating emotions will be valuable skill for me.
About the Facilitators
The session facilitators were Kiat Lim, a designer by trade, and his wife, Angeline Chng. They enjoy acquiring new skills and discovering the richness of the world around them through meaningful interactions. This event marked their first time facilitating as a couple and was designed to enhance participants’ emotional awareness and agility through a series of discussions and exercises.
This article was written by Holly Naylor, a British content writer specialising in sustainability who has lived in Singapore for 15 years. Holly helps businesses of all sizes craft their sustainable message and provides training on various aspects of sustainability. Connect with Holly on LinkedIn or email holly@theinspireandcreate.com.
Curious about facilitation and FNS’ next CoP event?
Check out www.fns.sg or email admin@fns.sg for more information.
CoP: Community of Practice
